SPORTS OBITUARIES |
Friday's Internet Edition, September 05, 2008.
not a chicken
|
Football Contest Director - Gentle Readers, the Contest Director fumbled in the first game of the season, insulting a certain segment of society and prompting a careful review by corporate lawyers.
After logging many billable hours, and after careful review of The Courier’s official handbook, the lawyers and the newspaper staff have agreed to issue this statement:
“Sorry.”
A letter received last week, shortly after the first week of the contest hit the street, prompted the crisis. It read:
“We are the proud owners of ‘The Little Red Rooster’ are greatly insulted that you refer to Little Red as a ‘chicken’ in your latest article. The coop tonight is sad. Little Red, a winner of the famed Cap of Caps, a very respectable second place finish and numerous third-place finishes, has been classified as a ‘chicken.’
“The travesty. Little Red has scratched his way into the Hall of Fame and yet no respect for this great bird. It is sad to report that Little Red has past on to that Great Coop in the Sky. The family of Little Red consists of five roosters, 864 hens and 3,204 biddies.
“It should be remembered that Little Red was also a huge Gamecock fan. At each Gamecock victory, we the proud owners lift an elbow to Little Red out of respect.
“We just ask that you do the same.”
Signed: Paul Battle, Rick Reid and Will Partin.
Gentle Paul, Rick and Will, upon careful review, the Contest Director did inadvertently challenge the manhood of Little Red. Flying without benefit of his playbook, the Contest Director relied on his faulty memory in re-tracing the history of the contest and the many and varied players who have challenged this contest.
Little Red — a certified rooster — was one of those glorious crowers who could peck out the answers with amazing success. The Contest Director was unaware of the rooster’s reproductive prowess or his untimely demise. We report that with heavy hearts.
Official business aside, who won last week’s contest?
RICKEY PAINTER, COME ON DOWN!
Painter, a contest player for most of our 24 years, claimed another Cap of Caps while missing only two games. He incorrectly picked Reynolds and Clemson to win while waltzing through the rest of the slate.
Second place: MIKE VANNOY of Clemmons, missing four games. He works at Triumph Group and used the tie-breaker to claim the second-place cash.
Which leads us to our coveted non cash awards:
CLOSE BUT NO CIGAR AWARD: To others missing four, Johnny Painter, Will Partin and Jim Brown. Brown could have been in the money but failed to include a tie-breaker prediction. Those missing five included Matthew Reese, and MeMa Painter.
BASKETBALL AWARD: To Ashley Royal, who missed 14 of 25 games, indicating that her specialty must be with the round ball.
YOUTH AWARD: To Edward Foster, 13, of Lewisville, missing 13 in his debut.
COACH’S AWARD: To Ron Rice, that old Little League master, who led Southwest Forsyth to the state championship some 22 years ago. He missed six.
MOST IMPROVED: Donna Carter, missing six and demonstrating she has been studying during the off-season.
PROFESSIONAL AWARD: To WSJS sports guru Jack LeFaivre, missing seven.
Now to our Mail Bag:
• This from Tarron Coalson: “I can’t pick Duke until they actually win. Not sold on Clemson against a good SEC team. Tempted to pick ASU but can’t against LSU at home. (App’s speed killed Michigan; not sure they’re faster than LSU).
• And from R. Allen Brown so elated at the contest’s return, “I feel like dancing like Snoopy.”
Good luck to all.
|
| The Southwest Forsyth girls 10-11 all-star softball team recently claimed the Little League state title in their division with two victories over Roxboro. The team includes: (1st row l to r) Laura Blizard, Morgan Carlson, manager John Wooten and Ally Wooten. (2nd row) Anna Marino, Ailee Ballard, Brynn Hudgins, Taylor Ferrell, Danielle Averitt, Claire Hess and Hannah Jung. (3rd row) Delaney Herber and coach Steve Ferrell. Southwest Forsyth was unbeaten during all-star play. |
In game one, Southwest scored five runs in the top of the first and never looked back as they claimed a 24-0 victory.
Six walks and hits by Claire Hess and Taylor Ferrell sparked the first-inning outburst.
Southwest pushed one run across in the second inning on a walk to Ally Wooten, two wild pitches and another hit by Hess.
Southwest then broke the game wide open in the third by scoring 18 runs off of 10 walks and seven base hits (including two by Ailee Ballard).
For the game, every Southwest player scored at least one run. Wooten led the way with four runs scored.
The starting pitching assignment in game one was handled by Wooten, who fanned four and did not allow a runner to reach base in two innings of work. AB Marino took over in relief in the third and struck out the side. Hannah Jung took the mound in the fourth and fanned two to complete the shutout.
In game two, Southwest again started quickly as Morgan Carlson collected a leadoff hit and scored on subsequent hits by Jung and Hess.
A leadoff walk to Ballard and hits by Danielle Averitt, Carlson, Ferrell and Jung brought in four more runs in the second. After Southwest tacked on hits by Ballard and Averitt to produce a run in the third, they padded their lead with a nine-run eruption in the fourth and a five-run outburst in the fifth. Hits by Blizard, Jung, Brynn Hudgins, Ballard, Marino, Carlson, Wooten highlighted the attack.
Southwest added four more runs in the sixth on hits by Hudgins, Ballard, Wooten, Carlson and Ferrell.
Every Southwest Forsyth player scored at least one run in game two. Carlson and Ballard paced the attack by scoring five runs each. Southwest won the game 24-12.