SPORTS OBITUARIES |
Friday's Internet Edition, July 03, 2009.
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Basketball Contest Director - Gentle Readers, this is finally the end. We’re kaput. Finished. The final week of this glorious basketball contest that has allowed us to stimulate the economy without government intervention, but alas, even we must bow to the waning basketball season, if not the difficult economy.
It’s up to President Obama and Congress for spring and summer stimulation.
Little doubt, Big Government will not be able to do what this Big Contest has done to bring real hope and joy to our readers and the American public. We have larded Courier Bucks upon our winners without the red tape associated with Washington. We have done it without scandal. Without lawsuit. Without the usual ineptness we have come to expect from the federal government.
If only we were running Washington …
Alas, next election …
Gentle Readers, this week features our final contest — just enough NCAA playoff games from Friday to titillate our readers for one final gambit. Then we will fall into a summer slumber until we are awakened by the pigskin once again and the joys of the return of our wonderful Football Contest.
Before we go, we must hand out last week’s prize money.
MARY JO PAINTER, COME ON DOWN. Mary Jo missed two games to claim first place.
Second? CHRISTINA ROEBUCK, COME ON DOWN!
Christina is a new player this season. A Huntersville girl, she is the apple of Clemmon native Andrew Mayse’s eye, and we understand there may be an announcement pending. Young Andrew has put his girlfriend to the ultimate test — determining whether she can win our contest. Needless to say, she passes our inspection. She missed four games last week and claimed the cash with her tie breaker.
Now for our coveted non cash awards:
CLOSE BUT NO CIGAR AWARD: To others missing four — Flake Steele and Gene Harrell.
FOOTBALL AWARD: For missing the most, Rick Painter, dropping 11. Wait … he’s the husband of this week’s winner …
Now to our Mail Bag:
• This from Lovely Leslie Madigan of Charlottesville, Va., “No way I’ll get the call this week….NBA is out of my scope! Go Heels.”
• Robert Foster, age 11, “(ACC Title Game) Tie Breaker: WAKE FOREST 86-84 on a buzzer beater over UNC (170 points). Most of these games I picked were pretty easy.”
Gentle Robert, you failed to anticipate the sleeping sickness that infected Wake Forest or the Big Toe crisis at Chapel Hill.
• R. Allen Brown, “The Heels with Big Toe problems; the Pack sacked (again); the Dook Devils- bedeviled (again)?; the Deacons demonizing or being demonized?; the Big Four – how can it be that another season is almost over? Who will the ACC Champion be? Who will the NCAA Champion be? Toss up the ball and get it on! It is a long time until football season. So enjoy the spring, the summer and wait until fall.”
• Wendy Boling, “I don’t know anything about the NBA, so I am at a disadvantage since I normally choose my teams by which mascot can beat the other.”
• Doug Hill, “I thought that last week was the week but Duke and Carolina did not do overtime so the tiebreaker score was way too high. Another CBNC.
Now you throw in the NBA. I am starting to get withdrawal symptoms knowing the end is near for the season. Could you talk the sponsors into doing a college baseball contest with maybe a few major league games? Or how about a NASCAR top ten finishes or the top ten PGA finishers each week? Can you tell that this is in my blood?
Thanks again sponsors for supporting something so worthwhile on a weekly basis.”
Good luck to all on our final week. Win now, or wait until the calendar turns to August.
series football contest
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Basketball Contest Director - Gentle Readers, this week the bouncing ball morphs from oblong to round. From football to basketball. Our contest returns this week, moving inside to the comforts of college arenas and away from the chilly outdoors.
It’s basketball time — time to crank up our cash cow advertising machine and offer our contest players the chance to stimulate their personal economies.
Our contest is on Page 2B, and faithful players will immediately recognize that this contest is a cake walk. Just 13 games. Win our grand prize by being the first to pick all the games correctly, and someone can become an instant member of our Contest Hall of Fame.
First we must wrap up some unfinished business: Awarding the cash from the final football contest of December, the annual college bowl series.
RICK REID, COME ON DOWN!
Reid missed eight of the 25 bowl games and used the tie breaker to claim first place.
RICK PAINTER, COME ON DOWN! Painter also missed eight but had to settle for second.
Now for our coveted non cash awards:
• Close But No Cigar Award: To Tony Marshall, also missing eight. Missing nine, Adam Boyles, Jim Frye, David Boyles, Jim Bovender, Tom Reebel, Karen Bovender, Paula Midkiff, Johnny Painter, Cheryl O’Hara and Ashley McCormick.
• Basketball Award: To those missing the most, 17 of 25 games, Ron Weiderman, Mary Binkley, Cameron Hartley.
This week’s contest includes only college games. Easy, easy, easy.
But you have to enter to win. Fulfill your New Year’s resolution to take the dare, to stick your neck out, to go where you have never gone before. Enter.
Good luck to all.